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Suburban Life Magazine March 2023

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Ps - File Addictions

“Maria’s Share”

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“Maria’s Share” – Note

… My mother, Noreen A. Whalen, passed away on December 20, 2011 …
… I can write that date without a blink of an eye or a second thought …
… I just can’t write anything further about my mom …

… My father, John B. Whalen, passed away on January 23, 2004 …
… I can write that date without a blink of an eye or a second thought …
… I just can’t write anything further about my dad …

… In my line of work, I deal with loss and dying and death on a daily basis …

… People deal and cope with loss and dying and death in different – and their own ways …

… Some write about it …

… Some think about it …

… Some bury it …

… Some ignore it …

… However …

… “it” never goes away …

… “it” never gets easier …

… “it” is always there …

… And your life is changed forever …

… This post is not about me …

… This post is from a very good friend of mine (Maria), who did write about her experience with loss and dying and death …

… Fortunately – and as always (at least for me and I hope for her, as well as you also) it has helped me beyond ways Maria can or will ever understand (just as I will never understand how Maria feels) …

… As usual, I hope you enjoy it as much as I have …

“Maria’s Share” – Message

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I’m about to share a very personal and emotional personal experience in the hopes of eliciting some deep reflection on a difficult and contentious topic.

The death of Phillip Seymour Hoffman rings so close to home for me of a past that to this day haunts me.

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There have been many to die before him of a drug overdose but for some reason his story has churned up a plethora of emotions.

You see I am my mother’s daughter and SHE was a rescuer. She began her nursing career as a Psychiatric hospital nurse and then became the Director of a drug treatment center.

I too am a rescuer – a rescuer of animals of all kinds including the human animal. My mother taught me to value every living thing and to understand that none are perfect. We all have demons.

I began rescuing at a very early age. Whether it was to rescue my neighbors dog from an isolated life in a laundry room or my first cat Samantha, who followed me home one dad and I had to keep her, or whether it was my first long and very complicated relationship.

You see that relationship was with a heroin addict, one much older than me, but a life disrupted that I thought I could save. I could not.

His demons were much too dark for a teenager, albeit I was a different type of teenager than your average one, but still the possessive nature of addiction was more than I was ready to tackle at the time.

I had known [him] for years before a relationship formed and was there to help him when his own mother finally took her own life (after threatening to do so many times before). This was really when our relationship grew stronger.

It was a very controversial and difficult relationship for my family to understand.

I knew that, but the bond between us was very strong.

He was – for me – a soulmate.

He was more intelligent than most knew and I – to this day still – have scribblings that he wrote about how things in society should change, and how very much he hated the addict that he was.

These were notes for him not meant for others to read and I found them in his belongings and I have had them tucked away for almost 30 years, after three very long and tumultuous years in a relationship that was understood by very few.

I found him lifeless on the floor of the apartment where he lived. It is a day, a scene and a smell that is burned into my memory for eternity.

It was about 7:30 in the morning and I was stopping by on my way to work to give him some presents I bought him for his birthday. I knocked on the door and got no answer.

He knew I was coming and my first feeling was that of anger. You see, this was an all too familiar thing to have him not be where he was supposed to be or doing the things he was supposed to do. Addicts are not all that reliable.

I peeked in the window and could see him lying on the floor with his back to the door – not that strange really – there were 3 people living in this one bedroom apartment, so often times one would sleep on the floor. I knocked again louder this time and nothing, so I tried the door and it opened.

I went in laid down next to him and put my arm around him. That was the moment I realized something was dreadfully wrong.

There was an odor, an odor I will never forget, one of death.

I quickly sat up and turned him over and he was blue and sputum streamed out of his mouth.

I shook him harder than I had ever shaken anything in my 18 years.

I knew he was gone.

My life changed immeasurably that day.

But it has helped sculpt me into the person I am today.

Oddly my family Doctor wanted to prescribe Valium for me to “help” me deal with the situation. I refused. Even my family wanted me to take them. I would put it in my mouth and pretend to swallow it and get rid of it.

Why are doctors so quick to prescribe drugs to help people deal with trauma? That masks the underlying issue – it doesn’t heal it.

I had never done a drug to that point and had no intention of trying to “fix’ the traumatic events with the very thing that had caused it. I prefer to simply face things head on and deal with the root of the problem instead of bandaging it in the hopes that it will simply go away.

I continue to be a rescuer, which is a continuous source of angst, disappointment, and heartache.

I worked at the drug treatment Center with my mother for 7 years and I became callused and angry with many of the addicts because too many of them seemed to be happy with their lives and “playing” the system.

I too must remind myself that addiction is more than just a weak person’s disease and that for many it is desperate attempt to shield oneself from pain and it sickeningly encompasses and destroys the soul to which it has attached it’s tentacles.

Below are some very poignant points about addiction from an article I just read in regards to Phillip Seymour Hoffman’s death.

I must say it relates to many addicts but not all, some simply do not want to change and others are desperate to find a way out of the living hell they have created in an attempt to find euphoria.

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At any rate some food for thought:

Addicts don’t want to be addicts.

Addicts don’t want to die.

Addicts don’t want to throw their lives away.

Addicts don’t want their children to grow up without parents.

They just want to feel better. They just want to feel normal. They just want to stop feeling everything else for a little while.

Addicts are people, just like you and me.

Addicts come in all forms, dependent on many different things, drugs just being one version of dependence.

The problem is that our system is limited, laboring under the illusion that drug addiction is a criminal issue, a medical issue on the fringes that can be fixed with proper rehab. That all ignores the fact that drugs aren’t the problem…what led that person to drugs in the first place is the problem. The drugs are just a means to an end.

Rehab doesn’t fix addicts. It primarily treats the physical symptoms of withdrawal.

Prison doesn’t fix addicts. It just puts them in a cage for a while.

Even death doesn’t fix addicts. It just leaves the people who love them here, forever wondering how different things might have been.

The only way to really deal with addiction is one that is multi-faceted, one that makes us uncomfortable. It is messy and complicated and takes a lifetime of effort. It sometimes involves relapses and second chances and third chances. It involves support, sometimes sponsors. It involves therapy and counseling until whatever the root cause is has been revealed and addressed. It involves consideration of not just the physical withdrawal, but also the emotional withdrawal, the social withdrawal, the psychological withdrawal. It requires a mental health system with adequate resources, which clearly doesn’t exist. It requires us to do better. It requires support instead of judgment.

And sometimes, even when all those things exist, it fails. It fails because addiction can take people and swallow them whole. It can rob them of everything they value, everyone they love. It can strip them of everything they care about, rob them of reason and logic. It can convince them that they aren’t worthy, that they have failed not just themselves, but everyone else. It tells them that they are broken and irreparable. Then it shoves them back down and does it again.

… Thank you very much, Maria …

Note: Italicized thoughts courtesy of DeBie Hive: Addiction, Mental Health and a Society That Fails To Understand Either

“Landslide”

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“Landslide” – Bio

Stevie Nicks (Stephanie Lynn Nicks)
Born May 26, 1948
American singer-songwriter, member of “Fleetwood Mac”

“Landslide” – Meaning

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I guess it was about September 1974, I was home at my Dad and Mom’s house in Phoenix, and my father said, ‘you know, I think that maybe … you really put a lot of time into this [her singing career], maybe you should give this six more months, and if you want to go back to school, we’ll pay for it and uh, basically you can do whatever you want and we’ll pay for it ~ I have wonderful parents ~ and I went, ‘cool, I can do that.’

[Then] Lindsey and I went up to Aspen, and we went to somebody’s incredible house, and they had a piano, and I had my guitar with me, and I went into their living room, looking out over the incredible, like, Aspen skyway, and I wrote Landslide … three months later, Mick Fleetwood called and asked us to join Fleetwood Mac.

So it was three months, I still had three more months to go to beat my six month goal that my dad gave me. So that’s what Landslide is about.

“Landslide” – Live

I took my love, I took it down
Climbed a mountain and I turned around
And I saw my reflection in the snow covered hills
‘Til the landslide brought it down
Oh, mirror in the sky
What is love?
Can the child within my heart rise above?
Can I sail through the changin’ ocean tides?
Can I handle the seasons of my life?

Well, I’ve been afraid of changin’
‘Cause I’ve built my life around you
But time makes you bolder
Even children get older
And I’m getting older, too

YouTube player

Well, I’ve been ‘fraid of changin’
‘Cause I’ve built my life around you
But time makes you bolder
Even children get older
And I’m gettin’ older, too
I’m gettin’ older, tooAh, take my love, take it down
Oh, climb a mountain and turn around
And if you see my reflection in the snow covered hills
Well, the landslide will bring it down
And if you see my reflection in the snow covered hills
Well, the landslide will bring it down
Oh, the landslide will bring it down

I took my love, I took it down
I climbed a mountain and I turned around
And if you see my reflection in the snow covered hills
Well the landslide will bring it down
And if you see my reflection in the snow covered hills
Well the landslide will bring it down
Oh, the landslide will bring it down

“Van Gogh’s Boat”

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Van Gogh’s Boat – Bio

Jean-Michel Basquiat
Born December 22, 1960 – August 12, 1988)
American Artist

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“Van Gogh’s Boat” – Jean-Michel Basquiat

Basquiat first achieved notoriety as part of SAMO©, an informal graffiti duo who wrote enigmatic epigrams in the cultural hotbed of the Lower East Side of Manhattan during the late 1970s where the hip hop, post-punk, and street art movements had coalesced. By the 1980s, he was exhibiting his neo-expressionist paintings in galleries and museums internationally.

Basquiat used social commentary in his paintings as a “springboard to deeper truths about the individual”, as well as attacks on power structures and systems of racism, while his poetics were acutely political and direct in their criticism of colonialism and support for class struggle. He died of a heroin overdose at his art studio at age 27.

In 1980, Basquiat met Andy Warhol at a restaurant. Basquiat presented to Warhol samples of his work, and Warhol was stunned by Basquiat’s genius and allure. The two artists later collaborated. When Andy Warhol died on February 22, 1987, Basquiat became increasingly isolated, and his heroin addiction and depression grew more severe.

Despite an attempt at sobriety during a trip to Maui, Hawaii, he died on August 12, 1988, of a heroin overdose at his art studio on Great Jones Street in Manhattan’s NoHo neighborhood.

He was 27 years old. He has now been included in the “27 Club.

Van Gogh’s Boat – David Bowie Sale

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Ten months to the day after his passing, the bulk of David Bowie’s personal art collection – some 400 works in total – went on the block at a three-part auction at Sotheby’s on Nov. 10-11, 2016, fetching a grand total of $41.1 million.

More than $30 million was sold on the first night alone, where well-heeled (and furred) attendees raised paddles against bids submitted around the world via phone and the Web.

Jean-Michel Basquiat’s “Air Power” was the evening’s — and the auction’s — top seller at $8.8 million, trouncing the pre-auction estimate of $3.3 million to enthusiastic applause

David Bowie Art Auction Fetches $30 Million on First Day. Jean-Michel Basquiat’s “Air Power,” which David Bowie bought in 1995 for $120,000, sells for $8.8 million at London auction.

Van Gogh’s Boat – Collectors

Notable private collectors of Basquiat’s work include David Bowie, Mera and Donald Rubell, Lars Ulrich,Steven A. Cohen, Laurence Graff, John McEnroe, Madonna, Debbie Harry of Blondie, Leonardo DiCaprio, Swizz Beatz, Jay-Z and Johnny Depp.

Van Gogh’s Boat – Basquiat Movie

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In 1996, seven years after the artist’s death, a biographical film titled Basquiat was released, directed by Julian Schnabel, with actor Jeffrey Wright playing Basquiat. David Bowie played the part of Andy Warhol.

Schnabel was interviewed during the film’s script development as a personal acquaintance of Basquiat.

Van Gogh’s Boat – Van Gogh’s Ear

Everybody wants to get on the Van Gogh boat

There’s no trip so horrible that someone won’t take it

The idea of the unrecognised genius slaving away in a garret is a deliciously foolish one

We must credit the life of Vincent Van Gogh for really sending this myth into orbit

I mean, how many pictures did he sell, one?

He couldn’t give them away

He has to be the most modern artist, but everybody hated him

He was so ashamed of his life that the rest of our history will be contribution to Van Gogh’s neglect

No one wants to be part of a generation that ignores another Van Gogh

In this town, one is at the mercy of the recognition factor

One’s public appearance is absolute

Part of the artist’s job is to get the work where I will see it

I consider myself a metaphor of the public

I am a public eye – a witness – a critic

When you first see a new picture, you don’t want to miss the boat

You have to be very careful

YouTube player

You might be staring at Van Gogh’s ear

“Go Your Own Way”

“Go Your Own Way”
Released 1977
British-American rock band Fleetwood Mac from album “Rumours”

“Go Your Own Way” – Ab Initio

Like most tracks on Rumours, the lyrical content of “Go Your Own Way” documents personal strain in relationships between other band members. Buckingham had written this as a response to his breakup with fellow Fleetwood Mac vocalist Stevie Nicks, who he knew since he was sixteen years old.

“I was completely devastated when she took off,” Buckingham noted “And yet I had to make hits for her. I had to do a lot of things for her that I really didn’t want to do. And yet I did them. So on one level I was a complete professional in rising above that, but there was a lot of pent-up frustration and anger towards Stevie in me for many years.” As he was crafting the lyrics, Buckingham came to the conclusion that while he was still bitter about his falling out with Nicks, the songwriting process helped him come to terms with reality.

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Upon listening back to the song, Nicks demanded that Buckingham remove the lyrics “Packing up, shacking up is all you wanna do”.

I very much resented him telling the world that ‘packing up, shacking up’ with different men was all I wanted to do,” she told Rolling Stone. “He knew it wasn’t true. It was just an angry thing that he said.

Every time those words would come onstage, I wanted to go over and kill him. He knew it, so he really pushed my buttons through that. It was like, ‘I’ll make you suffer for leaving me.’ And I did.” Buckingham ultimately decided to keep those lyrics in the final song.

“Go Your Own Way” – Ad Infinitum

In an interview with CBS News earlier this year, bandmates Mick Fleetwood and Stevie Nicks blamed it on Buckingham’s reluctance to sign off on a new tour. “This team wanted to get out on the road. And one of the members did not want to get out on the road for a year,” Nicks said. 

Buckingham has a 43-year history with Fleetwood Mac. He helped shape their classic sound and wrote some of their biggest hits. In January, the band was honored at the MusiCares Benefit Grammy weekend, but it would be Buckingham’s last performance with Fleetwood Mac. Two days later, he heard from their manager. 

“Irving Azoff called me up and he was basically screaming at me,” Buckingham said. “He was screaming at me on the phone saying, ‘You’ve really done it this time.’ And I had no idea what he was talking about. He said, ‘Stevie never wants to be on stage with you again,’ and I’m going, ‘Why?'”

YouTube player

“Go Your Own Way” – Ad Nauseam

Buckingham insists he had agreed to postpone his own solo tour to join the band, but said Azoff told him Nicks didn’t like his behavior at the MusiCares event. She complained that he had smirked behind her when she gave her acceptance speech.

“Silver Springs”

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“Dear Me” – “Silver Springs” – Bio

Stevie Nicks (Stephanie Lynn Nicks)
Born May 26, 1948
American singer-songwriter, member of “Fleetwood Mac”

“Dear Me” – “Silver Springs” – Dedication

… this post is dedicated to the definition of insanity, the efforts expended for searching, and the realization that things never resolve …

“Dear Me” – “Silver Springs” – Death

… My mother, Noreen A. Whalen, passed away on December 20, 2011 …

… I can write that date without a blink of an eye or a second thought …

… I just can’t write anything further about my mom …

… My father, John B. Whalen, passed away on January 23, 2004 …

… I can write that date without a blink of an eye or a second thought …

… I just can’t write anything further about my dad …

… in my line of work, I deal with loss and dying and death on a daily basis …

… people cope with loss in different ways …

… some write about it …

… some think about it …

… some bury it …

… some ignore it …

… anger … depression … bargaining … denial …

… however … “it” never goes away …

… “it” never gets easier … “it” is always there …

… and your life is changed forever …

“Dear Me” – “Silver Springs” – Life

… but before all of all of this …

… we have to deal with life …

… in a way, formulating the “it” …

… that will never go away …

… I’d like to think that we do our best …

… I’d like to think that things work out …

… I’d like to think that our dreams are realized …

… and I wonder …

… about how things could have been …

… and how they should have resolved …

Dear Me” – “Silver Springs” – Note

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Written by Stevie Nicks, “Silver Springs” was about Lindsey [Buckingham].

And we were in Maryland somewhere driving under a freeway sign that said Silver Spring, Maryland.

And I loved the name … Silver Springs sounded like a pretty fabulous place to me

And, ‘You could be my silver springs…’, that’s just a whole symbolic thing of what you could have been to me.

By 1997, Stevie Nicks and Lindsey Buckingham’s romance should have been ancient history. The pair had split two decades prior, fueling Rumours’ famously raw breakup anthems. But during a taping of a Fleetwood Mac reunion show later released as The Dance, shit once again got very real

Midway through a non-album rarity called “Silver Springs,” Nicks turned and faced her former flame as she sang the song’s rueful bridge:

“Time cast a spell on you, but you won’t forget me/I know I could have loved you but you would not let me.”

The pair locked eyes, and Nicks gradually built to a cathartic howl –

“I’ll follow you down ’til the sound of my voice will haunt you/You’ll never get away from the sound of the woman that loves you”

indicating that, for her at least, resolution had never really come.

Dear Me” – “Silver Springs” – Video

You could be my silver springs
Blue green colors flashin’
I would be your only dream
Your shining autumn, ocean crashing

And did you say she was pretty
And did you say that she loves you
Baby, I don’t wanna know

I’ll begin not to love you
Turn around, see me runnin’
I’ll say I loved you years ago
Tell myself you never loved me, no

And did you say she was pretty
And did you say that she loves you
Baby, I don’t wanna know
Oh, no
And can you tell me was it worth it
Really, I don’t wanna know

Time casts a spell on you, but you won’t forget me
I know I could have loved you, but you would not let me

Time casts a spell on you, but you won’t forget me
I know I could have loved you, but you would not let me
I’ll follow you down til’ the sound of my voice will haunt you
You’ll never get away from the sound of the woman that loves you
I’ll follow you down til’ the sound of my voice will haunt you
Stevie oversings: Was I just a fool?
You’ll never get away from the sound of the woman that loves you
Stevie oversings: Was I just a fool?
I’ll follow you down til’ the sound of my voice will haunt you
Stevie oversings: Give me just a chance

YouTube player

You’ll never get away from the sound of the woman that loves you
You could be my silver springs
My blue green colors flashin’

“Like Belushi and Candy”

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“Like Belushi and Candy” – Bio

Christopher Crosby Farley
February 15, 1964 – Died December 18, 1997
American actor and comedian

“Like Belushi and Candy” – Dedication

… this post (which is being republished today after Adam Sandler’s SNL hosting of SNL on May 4, 2019) is dedicated to the genius of Chris Farley, the memories of John Belushi and John Candy, and the deep and real friendship that Adam Sandler had which allowed him to write this song …

“Like Belushi and Candy” – Thoughts

… Saturday Night Live premiered on NBC on October 11, 1975 …

… Adam Sandler joined the show in 1990 …

… Chris Farley, Chris Rock, and David Spade also joined in 1990 …

… He left the show in 1995 … Together with Chris Farley …

… On December 18, 1997, Chris Farley was found dead by his younger brother, John, in his apartment in the John Hancock Center in Chicago; he was 33 years old …

… an autopsy revealed that Farley had died of an overdose of cocaine and morphine, a combination called a speedball …

… Farley’s death has been compared to that of his SNL idol John Belushi, who died at the same age of a similar combination of drugs …

… advanced atherosclerosis was cited as a “significant contributing factor ….

… Adam Sandler returned to host the show – 24 years later – on May, 4, 2019 –

… Season 44, Episode 869 overall …

… Adam ended the show with this song …

… Funny how the show began to make us laugh …

… But is now – more and more – making us cry …

… Sigh …

“Like Belushi and Candy” – Intro

… All right guys, gonna do this one …

… This a very special song, I hope you like it …

… It means a lot to us …

… Here we go …

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first time I saw him

he was sweeter than shit

plaid jacket and belt too tight

he wasn’t even doing a bit

then he cartwheeled ’round the room

and slow danced with a cleaning lady

he was a one-man party

you know I’m talkin’ about

I’m talking’ about my friend Chris Farley

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on Saturday night my man would always deliver

whether he was the Bumblebee Girl or

or LIVIN’ IN A VAN DOWN BY THE … RIVER

he loved the Bears and did the dance at Chippendales with Swayze

when they replaced his coffee with Folgers he went fuckin’ crazy

the sexiest Gap girl and Meatloaf in the band

without him there’d be no Lunch Lady in LunchLady Land

You know who I’m thinking about

I’m thinking about my boy Chris Farley

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after a show he’d drink a quart of Jack Daniels

and stick the bottle right up his ass

but hungover as hell that Catholic boy

always showed up to morning mass

we’d tell him ‘Slow down, you’ll end up like Belushi and Candy’

he said, ‘Those guys are my heroes, that’s all fine and dandy’

I ain’t makin’ that shit up that’s the truth about my boy Chris Farley

I saw him in the office

crying with his headphones on

listening to a KC and the Sunshine Band song

I said,’Buddy, how the hell is that making you so sad?”

then he laughed and said

‘just thinking about my dad.’

the last big hang we had

was at Timmy Meadows’ wedding party

we laughed our balls off all night long

all because of Farley

but a few months later

the party came to an end

we flew out to Madison

to bury our friend

nothing was harder than saying goodbye

except watching Chris’ father have his turn to cry

hey buddy, life’s moved on

but you still bring us so much joy

make my kids laugh with your YouTube clips

or “Tommy Boy”

and when they ask me

who’s the funniest guy I ever knew

I tell them, hands down

without a doubt, it’s you

yeah I miss hanging out

watching you try to get laid

but most of all

I miss watching you fuck with Spade

well, it ended how you wanted

but I still wish you were here with me

and we were gettin’ on a plane to go shoot “Grown Ups 3”

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yeah life ain’t the same without you, boy

and that’s why I’m singing’ about

I’m singing about my friend Chris Farley

and if we make enough noise

maybe he’ll hear us

give it up for the great Chris Farley

YouTube player

… And it did end like he wanted …

… Sigh …


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John B. Whalen, Jr., JD., LL.M., is an AV Peer Review Rated Preeminent 5.0 and Avvo Rated 10.0 Superb (obtaining over 95 client reviews and peer endorsements) premier and prestigious Attorney and Counselor at Law.

Mr. Whalen is featured on AV Peer Review Rated Preeminent 5.0, Avvo Rated 10.0 Superb, Avvo, Justia, Lawyers, Martindale, Nolo, and Quora.

John is located at 696 Pont Reading Road Ardmore Pa 19003. He serves all surrounding counties, on all 7 days, from 9:00 AM to 10:00 PM, and on evenings, weekends, and holidays.

Mr. Whalen provides free initial consults all seven days, provides home visits, and provides flat fee structures. He can be reached by email at jw60297@me.com, and by telephone at 1-484-417-6244.

John has amassed over 60 prestigious and premier professional awards and over 5000 client reviews and endorsements. Mr. Whalen has achieved the AV Peer Review Rated Preeminent award from Martindale, AV Peer Judicial Preeminent award, the Avvo Rated Superb 10.00 award, the Avvo Rated Top Lawyer award, the Clients’ Choice Award, and the Top One Percent (1%) award.

He is the recipient of the Legum Magister Post-Doctorate Degree (LL.M.) in Taxation (from the Villanova University School of Law), a recipient of the American Jurisprudence Award in Wills, Trusts, and Estates (from the Widener University School of Law), and a recipient of the ABA-BNA Law Award for Academic Excellence (from the Widener University School of Law).